Jong Belegen

I hope to God that my professors don't know who exactly in the class Kanika is, because I turned in an absurd exam yesterday. I literally made things up and had to keep going because each question had different parts. So I would make up something for part A, then I would have to make up things about the made up thing for part B. And then make up things about the made up things about the made up thing for part C. And... you get the picture. I'm ashamed.

On a more positive note... AQUA is on tour in Denmark right now. If any one of you purchases a plane ticket and meets me there, I will cover the cost of your ticket to the show. No really, I want to see them. Seriously. Cause I'm a barbie girl.

Quote of the Day: "At 14: 45 I will be under your house!"-Elena
"Under my house? Am I going to have to dig you out?"-Me
"jajajajjajajaj... it was not funny, don't joke with my english!"-Elena

...I'm tellin ya, these here foreigners keep me endlessly entertained.

McNuggetSkip 6 Stuks!

I have an exam tomorrow. And the day after. So I'm updating my blog. Because I can't read anymore. Especially when these chumps who write these papers feel the need to talk like this:

Notwithstanding the palpable tensions in this neoconservative ideology of benevolent global hegemony and universal values implemented by unilateral military power...

Wtf are you talking about, Thomas McCarthy? I'ma come find youuuu!

Anyway, I'm going to Amsterdam this weekend to celebrate the end of exams and (hopefully) passing them. I was already so excited to go. But I just became infinitely more excited because I stumbled upon this place (can you tell how hard I'm studying?):

http://www.dedriegraefjes.nl/

AN AMERICAN BAKERY. I've had some delicious pastries in cafes here. But God help me, I love a good ol' American cupcake. And they are hard to find! I don't know why, and I know you all agree, but a cupcake is so much better than a slice of cake. Nevermind that you can buy a whole cake for 10 bucks yet you pay 4 bucks for a cupcake. It's worth it. So just shut up. Is "nevermind" not a word? It's getting autocorrected into two words. Does anybody in the world besides Steve Jobs (RIP) know that it's two separate words? He just blew my mind from beyond the grave!

And back to studying I go...

Quote of the Day: "I dont know why people like True Blood and Twilight but whenever I say that I like Buffy people think I'm crazy."- Ilan Gutin

Cause I'ma Floss!

If there's one thing Americans do better than Europeans, it's floss. And start wars. Kidding! The other night my friends were over for dinner and the topic of oral hygiene came up (I pride myself on my teeth). They told me that they barely ever floss because it takes so long (10+ minutes???). I gave them the ol' Dr. Liu line- "only floss the teeth you want to keep!" and I assured them it takes but a mere 30 seconds, but they refused to believe me. So I had to show them. And teach them my wise, American, dental caring ways. I gave them all a string of my fancy Crest floss (floss in the US is actually better than the floss you find here) and we were off. They were astonished at how fast I went, and how, remarkably, I didn't slice my gums open. Needless to say, they all floss every night now. That'll teach em to ever talk trash about good ol 'Merica again!

It's study week right now. So, naturally, my room is spotless and I am none the wiser. Tonight I decided that catching a beautiful sunset on the Rhine was much more interesting and important in my life than teaching myself about what a book is. No really, this: 'Books cover virtually any topic, fact or fiction. For research purposes, you will probably be looking for books that synthesize all the information on one topic to support a particular argument or thesis. Libraries organize and store their book collections on shelves called "stacks". More and more books are also published in electronic format.' is part of what we learned in the course I am taking an exam for tomorrow. Wtf!? Anyway, you can't blame me for wanting to spend my time here instead:

Alright, I think I've wasted a sufficient amount of time now. I guess I'll study. I have always wondered what a newspaper was... Womp womp...

Quote of the Day: "TILBURG IS THE BOMB!"-Happy Dutch Boy!!!! :)
"Wow, someone watches a lot of early 90s American TV."-Me
"Oh, no one says that anymore?"-Sad Dutch boy :(

I'm So Loved...

Quote of the Day: "Haha! That sounded like a fert! I FERTED!!!"- Caro
"You mean fart???"- Me

I love non-native english speakers...

Where Was I?

Tonight I was riding my bike through puddles from the rain, and it reminded me of this:



...and I chuckled to myself in delight.

Well Hello, Ladies...

I'm Geert Wilders, the most ridiculous looking politician that ever did live. Can I buy you a drink?

Get A Load O' This Guy...

His name is Sinterklaas. Not to be confused with Santa Claus. They are two separate people in the Netherlands, but Sinterklaas plays a much more prevalent role around the holidays here. He spends the off-season lounging on the beaches of Spain. As you can see, his figure is much more pleasing to the eye than Santa Claus’s, so that would explain his frolicking around in a Euro-speedo in Spain, rather than bundled up in the North Pole. He comes to the Netherlands every year on his birthday, December 5th, on a boat with his dear horse that takes him around the country. He brings presents for all children, but beware! If you are bad, he will stuff you in his bag and take you back to Spain to teach you a lesson (First off, I don’t see how being whisked away to Spain is much of a punishment. Secondly, it’s a little inappropriate to stuff a child in a bag and take it home with you to “teach it a lesson,” don’t you think, Sinterklaas? I better not see you on “To Catch a Predator...") Oh, and don’t forget to leave a carrot out for his horse before you go to bed, poor thing needs energy to stay up all night! Also, he has a bunch of black guys that help him out. A full blown posse, if you will. Ya can’t make this stuff up. Well actually, I guess you can, since it all actually IS made up. But you can’t make up the fact that it’s made up!

So, let us review. Sinterklaas is a skinny lil’ guy. Santa is morbidly obese. Dutch children leave a carrot out for the lonesome horse that gives Sinterklaas a ride throughout the night. We leave cookies for Santa Claus, the glutton, to gorge on while his eight (or nine?), poor reindeer lug around his fat ass. Sinterklaas holidays in Spain, relaxing and enjoying life. Santa goes to the North Pole and works all year.

The differences between Europe and the US even exist in the make-believe world! I can’t wait for Christmas time in Holland… totes gonna get a picture with Sinter and his peeps.

Quote of the Day: "People are getting weird. I don't know if it's the economy crisis or climate change, but everyone is a weirdo."-Chin